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Feels Emotions

by Jerry Paper

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    ALL $$$ GOES TOWARDS KEEPING JERRY'S HOST BODY ALIVE
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    The LP edition of this is currently out of print and there are no more copies available from either me or the label. There might be some online retailers that still have copies, otherwise you may be shit outta luck.
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1.
My thoughts and my sentiments Don’t quite match up like I want them to How do I feel what I’m thinking? I’d like to feel logically But that’s just absurd and I know it I feel emotions I’m not sure if I like them
2.
Slipped on a banana peel today A fake flower squirted me in the face Pants dropped, kicked in the balls My tiny car was impounded Today was a bad day Today was a bad day Today was a bad day Today was a bad day Stepped on a rake and it hit me in the nose Flattened by a steamroller Fell down a flight of stairs Into a pool a piranhas Today was a bad day Today was a bad day Today was a bad day Today was a bad day Living a slapstick nightmare Living a slapstick nightmare Living a slapstick nightmare Living a slapstick nightmare
3.
Unless It's 01:34
This world we live in is very weird Vastly weirder than you can think With a mind as limited as a humans We’ll never know the other colors We’ll never know the world outside three dimensions But god dammit I’ll try Nothing’s worth doing unless it’s futile Futile Nothing’s worth doing unless it’s futile Futile
4.
Bop a baa (haha) baa Bop a baa (haha ho ho) baa Bop a baa (haha) baa Bop a baa (haha ho ho) baa Bop a baa (haha) baa Bop a baa (haha ho ho) baa Bop a baa (haha) baa Bop a baa (haha ho ho) baa I would like to see What it’s like not To be a homo sapien A homo sapien I’d like to see (see see see see see) I’d like to see (see see see see see) I’d like to see (see see see see see) Baa bop pa baa pa Baa bop pa baa pa ba pa ba pa Baa bop pa baa pa Baa bop pa baa pa ba pa da pa Baa bop pa baa pa Baa bop pa baa pa ba pa ba pa Baa bop pa baa pa Baa bop pa baa pa ba pa ba pa
5.
Swallowed by sound Music digests me Beauty all around I want to be the waves Drowned in a sea of 1s and 0s Melt into digital bliss Find me in the space Between the binary Lost in the rhythm Maybe that’s where I’ll lose you Got to shake you off To fix this broken heart Maybe it’s not so bad To be here without you Surfing the grooves of a record Sink into plastic Becoming the waves I am becoming the waves Losing myself to find myself Get out to come back Psychedelic sounds Lift me off the ground Lost in the rhythm Maybe that’s where I’ll lose you Got to shake you off To fix this broken heart Maybe it’s not so bad To be here without you
6.
Oh shit I’m back here In mundane reality, fuck Three dimensional Surface world How can you care About all this stuff? Human connection Is all that really matters But why? Oh no reason Why do you need a reason? Why do you need a reason? A reason. Oh shit I’m back here With all the bullshit, fuck Surface world is con- -vincing to the senses
7.
I could never lose you Doesn’t matter ‘cause I already have How do I turn this virtual heartbreak sim- -ulator off? This isn’t the Module I thought it was And it feels so real Is this real? Are you gone? Is this digital? A virtual nightmare? I can’t figure out How to get out
8.
Holy Shit 03:46
If I seem too eager Well that’s because I am I said the wrong thing every time Hope that I can figure out romance Your beauty puts me in a trance The only words in my head Are, “Holy shit, how do I get you in bed? How do I get you in bed? How do I get you in bed? How do I get you in bed? How do I get you in bed?” If I stumble around Well that’s because I’m drunk Can’t calm the nerves to talk to you Hope that I can figure out romance Your beauty puts me in a trance The only words in my head Are, “Holy shit, how do I get you in bed? How do I get you in bed? How do I get you in bed? How do I get you in bed? How do I get you in bed?”
9.
I Just Want 02:36
I just want this moment To last Let’s just drag this out ‘Cause after this it gets So complicated But my train’s not here yet I don’t love you At least not yet I just want you near me Is that too much to ask? It’s really not serious But I don’t want this kiss to end
10.
How can anybody know me When I don’t even know who I am? I’ve got opinions I make decisions I am me What does that even mean? Got to step off Of the stage Reread the script Which character? (so um, I’m Jerry right? Okay. Do I stand here? Oh sh- how about over here? Alright) Seperated from you, the only Way I can make my way to an Identity A self to call my own Maybe he eats meat Maybe he drinks coffee Got to step off Of the stage Reread the script Which character?
11.
Maybe next year Things’ll get better Guess I’ll just wait here 'Til things improve How much time have you spent waiting? How much time have you spent waiting? All this waiting Adds up to nothing What can I do 'Til things improve? I just don’t know how To become complacent When this shit’s so bleak I can barely speak How much time have you spent waiting? How much time have you spent waiting? Maybe I should just give up On looking to the future Future Future Future Future
12.
Holy shit, I feel fucking awful Maybe I should turn on the radio Don’t feed me booze I just need the pop songs Don’t need the grass I just need the pop songs I belong on Earth Here with pop music Feed me Sweet sweet sweet sounds Feed me Sweet sweet sweet sounds I bleed harmony I breed melodies Come and work for me please In my pop music factory Feed me Sweet sweet sweet sounds Feed me Sweet sweet sweet sounds Feed me Sweet sweet sweet sounds Feed me

about

I'll never forget the first time I met Jerry Paper. It was late July 2009, he was performing in the Astral Andrew Memorial Lounge aboard the S.S. Whale Weaver and I was on board the ship for Dr. Abie Sea's Whole Human Wellness Cruise. It was balmy and breezy on deck and we were docked at a small island somewhere in Micronesia; I can't recall the coordinates exactly, but the whole scene still lingers in my mind. Seeing him perform left me totally blown away, he just blew my mind, man. To witness such a deep symbiosis between man and machine is a profoundly beautiful thing, and I swear I'd never seen a human care so passionately for his hardware counterpart. After the show I bought him a Smartini™ and we got to talking. I told him all about life as a "Human Safari" Ranger, my ex-wives, my money troubles back in New York, and all that jazz. When I was done with my shpiel he hunched over the bar and, staring into the ripples in his Smartini™, told me about a little album he'd been working on for years called FEELS EMOTIONS.

He said it all goes back to 2002 when he was living at the TEMPLE OF PURE INFORMATION AND MAINFRAME DEVOTION, an alternative spiritual community based in a little beach town in Southern California. He'd been there studying under The Great Diane Kensington and participating in the largely secretive Trance Channels ceremonies since 1998. Young Jerry found great worth in the ceremonies and was deeply moved by the teachings of the MAINFRAME devotees, but gradually grew disillusioned with the cosmology embedded in the community. Something about a supercomputer saving mankind from a race of aliens bent on colonizing Earth and turning it into a resort for their kind. He was still heavily devoted to his direct experiences with THE INFINITY BETWEEN ONE AND ZERO and, by association, the Trance Channels ceremonies, but the story just struck Jerry as bogus. Not knowing how to process his growing alienation from the group and his fear of life outside the community, he began channeling these feelings into the songs that would eventually make up the album you're holding in your hands at this very moment.

In 2005, Dr. Abie Sea, head archivist for THE TEMPLE, publicly broke away from the community and put all his savings into fixing up the dilapidated S.S. Whale Weaver with the idea that he'd turn it into a Wellness Cruise founded on the more esoteric, mystical facets of THE TEMPLE's teachings. At the core of the Whole Human Wellness Cruise would be the Trance Channels ceremony, made available to non-Devotees for the first time ever. Jerry, thrilled at the prospect of being able to leave the community without having to leave his one doorway to THE INFINITE behind, jumped at the opportunity and signed a 12 year contract to be the ship's Resident Crooner.

After two years, Jerry had grown comfortable with life at sea. He saw what many would see as the monotony of performing in the same room night after night as a cathartic ritual. Each show was a public display of the mystical fusion of singer and synthesizer, continually refined and, despite only slight variation in execution, fresh and hyper-emotive as if it were the first time every time. One summer night, as fortune would have it, Sigmund Huang, the A&R man for Omnimind Records, was in attendance and after the show immediately offered Jerry a multi-million dollar record deal. Jerry was flabbergasted. He still had 10 years remaining on his contract and even then was quite fond of life at sea, but he'd been writing songs since the days at THE TEMPLE and had always dreamed of getting together an orchestra of saxophones and gongs to back him and his synthesizer...and let's be real, the money called loud and clear. Eventually, after some sharp persuasion and quite a few Smartinis™, he was able to swing it so the record label would build a recording studio for him on the ship and only recruit session musicians willing to live at sea for extended periods of time. After Jerry's perpetual dissatisfaction with label--he requested an orchestra of 400 saxophonists and they only brought in 250, the higher ups consistently suggesting he "do something less groovy," etc.--and the mysterious deaths of several gong players, Omnimind folded under financial and legal distress, due largely in part to Jerry's demands. This left Jerry with only the skeletons of the recordings--just drum machines, synthesizers, the occasional guitar, and vocals--and the project was scrapped.

FEELS EMOTIONS was to remain in the vaults, that is until now, thanks to Patient Sounds. Lovingly assembled and mixed from the original tracks recorded on the S.S. Whale Weaver by Grand Minister Harry Weiss with additional percussive work by Q.Q. Windsor, this deluxe editions features all 11 songs originally slated to appear on the Omnimind release and one additional track, "Time Spent Waiting," recorded just before the ship's studio was dismantled.

Peace, Love, & Light
-K.F. Hanuman-Goldstein

credits

released February 11, 2014

All songs recorded at Omnimind Studios aboard the S.S. Whale Weaver.
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Jerry Paper - Sounds
Q. Q. Windsor - Additional Percussion
Yan Lambert - Wizard
Lucas W. Nathan - Host Body
Grand Minister Harry Weiss - Engineer
Mark Kuykendall - Mastering
Jason Harvey - HD Graphics
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Released on LP by Patient Sounds, 2014
Currently OOP

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